I'm still learning to share.

I consistently find myself thinking about an event/thought/idea to post to Facebook or Twitter but realize that hours and even days have passed from when that event/thought/idea originally took place and it would be silly and irrelevant to post it now. I wonder why that is? I think I am a fairly intelligent person. I’m not a slow thinker or processor. Not saying I’m on the level with my brother Jon who put most mere mortals to shame with how quickly his brain processes information and makes connections, but I know I process at least at an average speed. So, why does this always happen to me? 

For example, my car battery died Sunday morning. After service, Dad and I got it started again after rolling it out of the garage which took some figuring out since it took us awhile to get my automatic gears into neutral when they remained locked in place with no battery power to turn the car to “on.” All is well now, but that event would be worthy of a quick post to the online world. It’s an interesting anecdote with a happy ending. Then why did it not even occur to me to type up a quick note about it until today?

Here’s my theory: I am not normally an open person when it comes to the details of my life. For so long, I did not share my life with anyone except my family. Everyone else just saw the surface and not the undercurrents that made up the rest of me. I was a very private person. I still am to a degree. The introverted aspect of my personality advises me to keep things to myself. Growing up with parents and a name that everyone knew also influenced me into being more internally focused. However, I have learned that this type of behavior is not beneficial for me when it comes to the relationships I have with people or the lack thereof. Everyday I try to be more open with those I come in contact with, but it is a process. I have to remind myself daily, hourly to share what I’m thinking and feeling. Otherwise, how are people ever going to know who I am? How will they ever come to the realization that I’m pretty awesome if I never let them see the real me?  (These questions are merely rhetorical and merely serve to drive home my point.) 

Thus, I talk to people and join online communities like Facebook and begin conversations with strangers and write in a blog and share myself with the world at large, so that I might be known.